Krewe du Mishigas
Epic Schlep to Mishigas land
Using Real Audio. Can you guess?: guess.rm
The Promised Land-- The year is 5760. Homer is long dead, yet the tale of a heroic journey lives beyond his grave. Following another great Exodus, Mishigas, scattered around the globe, still wander in disbelief that G-d would lead his people to the only place in the Middle East without oil.
In Israel, a few days before the eve of what some consider to be a new millennium, millions of people flocked to Bethlehem to await the return of their savior. Rumor has it that he never showed up, but was instead seen at the House of Mishigas drinking Mishigashine with the Metairie Mishigasbillies...but that's another story.
A few days later, during Helen of Goy's ritual tree burning on a New Orleans's levee, a voice quietly boomed several blocks away at a bagel decorating party. The following message was heard by G-d's chosen Krewe:
"Alright already! The land of Israel, which was given to your ancestors, has become far too dangerous. You could put your eye out! And now all the tourist!
"Enough with all this kvetching! The time has come once again for you to embark upon a great journey. You are commanded to pack up your bagels and schlep out east. Try to avoid I-10 during rush hour. Anyway! There you will find the new Promised Land. It's a nice place, but idolaters are already in the process of constructing a temple there called Jazzland. Your mission -- should you chooseth to accept it -- is to second line unto this land, and stoppeth this idolatry! What you do after that is your business. And call me when you get there!"
Well! The Krewe du Mishigas got right to work. After making a few changes here and a few changes there, Rabbi Odysseus is pleased to announce the grand opening of Mishigasland: The New Promised Land.
Step right up!
Get the front seat on the world's first Bagel Coaster!
Blast off at the speed of light in Einstein's Atomic Rocket!
Go in circles on Karl Marx's Revolution Wheel!
Bring your young ones on Woody Allen's Orient Express!
Plunge deeply into Sigmund Freud's Tunnel of Love!
Win the big bucks at Alan Greenspan's "If I were a Rich Man" video Mah-Jong.
See Mishigasland from above on "From Your Lips to G-d's Ears" Gondola!
And don't forget to haggle at Joan River's Fashion-No-Nos (why pay retail).
Trust us! There's fun for the whole family! You can still hear the great sound of Jazz at George and Ira Gershwin's Wonderful World while noshing at Klezmer's, Kosher Soul Food Cafe. So on February 19th come on out and join our carnies as Rabbi Odysseus and Helen of Goy lead the Krewe du Mishigas through the parade -- if you are lucky enough to get a Krewe du Mishigas Bagel, the Mishigasland Season Pass is Free.